Life must go on: On coping with grief by Lucy Ngari

When you’re grieving it is both important and difficult to take care of yourself.

Your loss may take away your energy, your appetite and your emotional reserves.

How to take care of yourself

1) Allow yourself to grieve: Often we push the grief away, or tamp it down by distracting ourselves with activities or tasks. Trying to avoid grief only leads to prolonging it — the grief has to be allowed to surface. Unresolved grief, can lead to depression, anxiety, substance abuse and health problems.

2) Express your feelings in a tangible way: This can be done in many ways, depending on your creativity or usual means of expression. You can write about your loss in a journal, or send a private note to the person you’ve lost. You can make a scrapbook, photo album or create an online memorial celebrating that person’s life. You can also get involved in an organization or philanthropy that was meaningful to them, or make a donation in their name.

3) Be physically healthy: Your mind and body are connected, and physical health helps with the emotional healing process. It’s natural to feel lethargic or low energy, but if you’re able to take a walk or a run, it will promote the process. Combat your fatigue with an appropriate amount of sleep, and choose foods that provide you not just with comfort but energy.

4) Don’t judge yourself, or let others judge you: You are allowed to grieve for as long and as deeply as you need to. No one — including yourself — can tell you when to “move on” or “get over it.” It’s okay to be angry, to cry, not cry, or even laugh — you need to allow for moments of joy in your grief, and feel no guilt for having a moment without pain.

5) Find support:- in family, friends, faith based groups, therapists/ counselors. Being able to share your story or your feelings is vital to the healing process.

“Wacha niKwambie”

September 2018 – Lifemustgoon

Soaring after loss – emotional and spiritual wellness

Note:

Lucy Ngari is a Counseling Psychologist based In Kenya. This article is meant to be a guide in healthy grieving. If you need the services of a counselling psychologist to deal with your grief please visit a duly accredited one.

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